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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30068184">fight over the jaw titan</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/three_rats_in_a_trenchcoat/pseuds/three_rats_in_a_trenchcoat'>three_rats_in_a_trenchcoat</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack Fic, Gen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:21:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,093</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30068184</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/three_rats_in_a_trenchcoat/pseuds/three_rats_in_a_trenchcoat</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>yo just read the title</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kaya (shingeki no kyojin)/Gabi Braun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>fight over the jaw titan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gabi sat down next to Kaya on the river bed. </p><p>“Sorry again for attacking you,” Kaya said.</p><p>“Apology accepted, sorry for shooting your adoptive sister and fortnite dancing over her dead body while saying gg lol”</p><p>“You were just angry that she shot other people, I get it. When I get angry I kill baby chickens, it’s almost the same”.</p><p>“Yeah” Gabi said and looked into the water.</p><p>“Y’know, since that day where I tried to kill you I wanted to tell you something” Kaya suddenly said.</p><p>“And what is that?” Gabi asked curiously.</p><p>Kaya took a deep breath ;” you inspire me Gabi, I even shaved my mullet off and grew a real hairstyle that doesn’t look like I fuck my brother. You even taught me how to beat someone up and take their money…”</p><p>“What are you trying to say” gabi asked</p><p>“The truth is Gabi,” she hesitated and hid her face in the scarf she had gotten from Gabi “you wrapped this scarf around me and I am so very thankful for it.”</p><p>“Kaya..”Gabi said.</p><p>“Gabi” Kaya said and stood up “I have always loved y-...”</p><p>In that moment Falco came naruto-running out of the forest and kicked Kaya in the river while yelling “Gabi is mine you dirty whore”.</p><p>“Falco” gabi gasped.</p><p>“Don’t worry babe, big F got this” he said confidently.</p><p>“Did you just keep me from confessing my love to my dear Gabi?” Kaya yelled.</p><p>“Oh yes I did” falco said “And I’d do it again”</p><p>“Well then come at me” she said and ripped off her shirt revealing her incredibly hairy chest.</p><p>Falco ran at her and tried to push her to the ground but Kaya was stronger and broke both of his arms with one push.  Falco screamed in pain but his arms were broken so hard that the bones were sticking out so he could transform into the jaw titan.</p><p>Falco screamed at the top of his lungs and turned into his bird like titan form. He tried to step on Kayam but she was still stronger.</p><p>“In the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit” she yelled as she graded his leg and whirled him around until she finally let go and he crashed into the trees on the other side of the river.</p><p>“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” she yelled and hit her fists onto her chest.</p><p>“Now you’re mine Gababy” she said and picked up gabi bridal style”.</p><p>“Oh my big strong Kaya” Gabi said.</p><p>“Not so fast” someone who had just come out of the forest said.</p><p>It was Zeke.</p><p>“Warchief Zeke yeager of the Marleyan warrior unite what are you doing here” Gabi said.</p><p>“I am here to tell you that I approve of this, as a lesbian couple you two can’t have children so I don’t have a problem with it” he said, gave them a thumbs up and disappeared into the forrest again.</p><p>“Isn’t he dead?” Kaya asked.</p><p>“I don’t know I should be dead too so I guess it’s okay”.</p><p>“Well then,” Kaya said, “My beautiful Gabi baby, no kiss me” she said and united their lips.</p><p>After 20 minutes of kissing (no sex because sex before marriage is a sin) Kaya finally let Gabi back onto the ground.</p><p>“Let’s tell the Blouse family about our newfound love” Gabi said and grabbed Kayas hand.</p><p>Suddenly a big boulder dropped on Kaya and she got crushed.</p><p>Falco’s bird jaw titan landed on top of it “GG ez” he said and started flossing.</p><p>“What the fuck Falco” Gabi said.</p><p>“Lol now you’re mine”</p><p>Suddenly the boulder started shaking, it broke in half and Kaya came out of it. She was again banging her fists on her chest and yelling.</p><p>“How dare you oppose me you heathen, I have the power of Jesus, God, the holy spirit and the pope on my side”.</p><p>“You’re catholic” Gabi gasped.</p><p>“Yes of course” Kaya said “why do you think I shaved a cross into my chest hair”.</p><p>Now that she had mentioned it there actually was a big cross shaved into her chest hair.</p><p>“I don’t like catholics” Gabi said and took out her gun “I don’t want anything to do with someone like you” she said and shot the blond girl in the head.</p><p>“Yo wtf gabi” Falco said.</p><p>“She was on the wrong side of christianity” Gabi said and blew the smoke away from her guns barrel.</p><p>As Gabi went to leave with Porco, Kaya stood up again.</p><p>“In nomine patris et filii et spiritus sancti” Kaya said and her eyes started glowing red “HOW DARE YOU OPPOSE THE TRUE CHRISTIAN FAITH”.</p><p>Falco, who had transformed into his human form again ran at her and attacked her. She grabbed his arm, twisted it onto his back and bit into his neck hard.</p><p>Gabi watched in shock as Kaya ripped off Falcos head with her teeth.</p><p>“Good now let’s go home and tell the blouse family of our newfound love” Kaya said.</p><p>Despite the fact that she was covered in blood and had ripped open her shirt to display her hairy chest she pretended nothing had happened. </p><p>“Ok” Gabi said and they went to the blouse family.</p><p>On the way Gabi fell back a bit.</p><p>“What’s up my Gababy, why are you not next to me anymore” Kaya asked after some time.</p><p>“It’s just” Gabis began and looked down “Of course I love you but you’re catholic, I’ll never be able to accept this”.</p><p>“I see,” Kaya said, disappointed.</p><p>She caught Gabis arm as the brown haired girl stormed at her and tried to stab her with her knife. Gabi freed her arm again and jumped back.</p><p>“So this is a war on the true faith now” Gabi said and twisted her knife so she held it in a backwards grip.</p><p>Kaya smiled excitedly. She tried to roundhouse kick Gabi, who jumped away, and hit a tree instead, the tree fell on what remained of Falco.</p><p>Gabi suddenly appeared above Kaya and tried to strike with her knife, she actually hit and Kaya stumbled back in pain while her wound was already healing. Gabi saw her chance and hit her knee into Kayas stomach, then her elbow in Kayas face and then headbutted her.</p><p>Finally Kaya fell to the ground unconsciously. </p><p>Gabi went and cut off the skin on her head. She then bit out her neck and became the jaw titan.</p><p>She saw some of Galliards memories and knew she would never be able to look at Reiner the same way.</p>
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